A Mother's Love.

A blog about the love I have in my heart for my two daughters and the desire I have to add to my family again. Lilly Anna here with me on Earth born October 27, 2006 and Daisy Arabella whom I lost to Trisomy 13 or 18 when she was stillborn at 36 weeks and 3 days on January 26, 2009.

Saturday, May 22, 2010

I miss you.

Missing my Daisy tonight. Ready to see those 2 pink lines and feel those little belly flutters again.

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Spread the love.

I saw this blogspot on a friend's Facebook page and I decided to share a text message I sent to my Grandmother on May 17th.

In my eyes you are an angel.

You have taught me what it's like to love with your whole heart.

You have taught me what it is like to put others before yourself.

You have shown me what the perfect example of a loving wife, mother, and Grandmother is.

You have a beautiful heart.

I admire you and I strive to live my life as you have lived your's.

I find you inspiring and I often tell Lilly (my daughter) and Cayce (my husband)that I think you hung the moon.

I love you so much!

I didn't ever really get a chance to write in your Mother's Day card, but this is what it would have said.

Much much love, Amber

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Until then...

Doesn't know where to start...

I have been happy, truly happy the last few months. I love my new job. I know how blessed I am to have this oppurtunity and new space. But, I am feeling rather "blah" the last few days to a week. I am hoping it is just this cold or allergies that I am batteling. I am so congested. That makes for feeling bad. But, I feel a little disconnected. Disconnected from everyone really.

Enough about that... So we didn't conceive in March or April but my cycles have gotten shorter and are getting more on track. I was looking for ovulation later in my cycle in April and it happened earlier. So, we will keep on keeping on. I am really ok with it. It is still hard sometimes to see people/friends with their baby bumps or their new baby or toddler that would be Daisy's age. I cannot believe she'd be a year and 3 months old already! Time has certainly helped to heal that wound, but my heart still aches. I still want to fill that nursery in the back of the house. I want to hold and to feed and kiss my baby again. When the time comes we will be over the moon happy to see a positive pregnancy test and to hear that heartbeat again. :)Until then I try to stay patient and wait.

Mother's Day is this coming Sunday. We will be going to my Grandmother's to have lunch and I look forward to going to see Daisy and to take her the sleeping baby angel statue that I bought. I love it. The baby is so peaceful and perfect. She was born after she had already gone to heaven. That seems so backwards. But, I like knowing she went peacefully. I believe she never hurt. One day Jesus we will see her again. What a glorious day that will be. Until then, we live our lives serving the Lord and taking care of our other child/ren the best we can.

On another note...I have lost 30 lbs. since I began my weightloss journey in Feb. =) Let Summer bring it on! LOL I am so ready to take Lilly to the beach. She loves it as much as I do!

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